Woman RANT!

Woman RantAs a woman, there are certain things that I do but grumble about each time. First is teeth whitening. It’s not only the cost,that would buy a good meal or half a pair of fine shoes, it’s the principle. Who decided that teeth whiter than nature intended for ANYBODY is the only acceptable color? The 17th century Japanese favored teeth painted black. Now, I agree that deeply yellowed and stained teeth are, well—shudderingly gross. But some people go so far with whitening that their teeth could light up bat cave! I personally think snowy white teeth that look like a melted down and reformed glow in the dark plastic Jesus are ludicrous.

The other grumblies I have about being a socially acceptable woman are leg shaving, underarm shaving, and eyebrow plucking. I do shave and pluck but not without bitching about it. Thankfully, it’s required less often as I age, but nevertheless, who set that rule into motion? Waxing is another barbaric practice akin to Chinese foot binding. Ukh! Thank the powers that I grew up when pubic hair was not considered something that needed to be removed. Just trimmed a bit in swimsuit season!

I once saw an interview  where men were asked their opinion of women who didn’t shave their underarms. Most of the  men thought it was unsanitary. Huh? Men don’t shave. Are they equally unsanitary? Maybe best not to answer that.

Why is it that women feel a need to play into a man’s desire to have a woman hairless except for eyebrows and head hair, which has to be long, thick, and luxurious? Is it that these men have repressed pedophilia and want their women to resemble children as much as possible?

The exception, I guess, is grossly over-inflated boobs, but that can also go back to childhood. A mother’s breast looks mighty large to a baby. Sorry, that may have conjured up a picture of something you CAN’T UNSEE!  EEEWWW, giant mammaries! Freud had a lot to say about that one. So the desire for women to look like children except for the breasts, in my never-to-be-humble opinion, is more than a bit twisted.

What would happen if women decided that they could be attractive AND more natural? Well, a lot of women do, but I will venture a guess they’re a minority. Mostly we shave, whiten teeth, spend hours and mucho dollars on our hair, wear high heels, bras, body shapers, and acrylic nails painted fancy. We wear makeup to accentuate eyes and make our skin look more youthful. Women of a certain age range, generally choose clothing made to accentuate sexual attractiveness. A middle-aged or elderly woman who continues to dress in tight, revealing, and sexually attractive clothing, however, is generally considered an oddity or socially acceptable.

I understand that the primitive desire to couple and reproduce is a strongly embedded urge, just as it is in other animals. But, who decided that it should be the women who make the most concessions to nature in often unhealthy and uncomfortable ways? Men shave their beards—if they want to. They wash (most of the time). For men, two socially acceptable ways to attract a mate is to show power and money.

We are complex creatures full of primitive drives. Unfortunately, we are mostly clueless about them. Many humans like to think that we are above the animal kingdom, yet many of the same urges drive us that drive them. We are all concerned about survival, safety, connecting with others of our kind, procreation, and survival.

What would it be like to base our opinion of attractiveness on what’s in the mind and heart instead of the wrapping, ribbons, and bows? It might be worse. It might be better. It may be impossible. Hmm. Just sayin’….

As a woman of a “mature age” I find that life is a lot easier. I no longer care so much about what others think of me. I am more able to express my opinions openly. I dress the way I want to most of the time. I generally shun high heels and have stopped coloring my hair. I wear make-up but not always. I wear jewelry because I like it. Life is good. Still, I dress okay, I think. I am clean, neat, and my clothes reflect my personality. The clothes I wear are attractive to me.

I stopped dieting and simply eat what I want, and what’s healthy for my body. Sometimes, though I eat food that is NOT healthy just for the sheer pleasure of it. And, you know what? I didn’t get hugely fat. But even if I do, so what? That’s another thing people are so obsessed about—body fat.

I’ve said it before. I think people would be happier if they stopped worrying about fat and cared more about health. There is conflicting evidence about whether obesity (to a point) is or is not unhealthy. Some women are so obsessed about looking like a stick bug that they  damage their health. Jeesh, let it go!

End of soapbox.

Agree? Don’t agree? Think I’m a douch? Think I have it right? Love to hear.




About anitaburns

Confetti Head: My life of change, and color, weirdness, and fun. From the colorful days of Hippie, to all night rocker parties, to married life, contemplation, meditation, and more. My life has been blessedly full and rich. Anita's Real Food: I have loved cooking since my first Easy Bake Oven when I was four. I bake, cook, invent, share, and eat. Enjoy my Real Food Blog. Astrology Learning and Secrets: LIttle-known facets or a deeper dive into the wonderful world of Astrology
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10 Responses to Woman RANT!

  1. Michele Haviland says:

    Love It!!!!


  2. Sue Nehring says:

    I AGREE!!! this kind of remonds me of a story Erma Bombeck wrote called “Fashions and Fads that Underwhelmed Me”.


  3. Michael McLane says:

    My URL? Well, usually it is Valvoline when I can get it.

    Recently we were in Bodie. A grouse (some times call a sage hen) started to cross the road in front of us but then turned and walked towards Tulita. Yes, you guessed it – – Tulita had not shaved her legs.

    Some would say, “It has gone too far!” Oh yes, you did.

    Tulita and I go out to eat breakfast a lot. While in our favorite eateries, it is not always about food. Tulita usually provides a whispered running dialog of what is going on with the couples there. Then I try to practice my dead pan and so do the waitresses who are hanging near to overhear her narration.

    The other part has to do with looks. We can do that you know. We both wear oversized dark glasses and frumpy hats. Incognito movie stars, don cha know? Oh yes the looks – – –

    It seems that everyone is working on overtime to try to get someone to the bed. I wonder at the tactic and what happens if you have to undress in the light? OK, the implants do not usually show right away but some, like you say, EAEEEEWWWWW.

    Men? No problem. Men live in their own fantasy. Sharp car – sharp man. Money does not speak, it screams, and gets the job done. Oh, wait! Hair styles for men? Boutiques for men? After-shave?

    Never mind.


  4. saba says:

    I love what you wrote. I am in age now where i understand what you are saying. i have wasted my enery and my money.


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